It had been a tough day. My reactions to the kids had been... well, if you were gonna be kind, you could call them "less-than-patient", and I was feeling terrible at the way my anger had gotten the best of me. Multiple times. I never thought I was an angry person... till I had kids.
My only hope was that in genuinely apologizing to them, and telling them "I am so sorry. Mommy doesn't always do the right thing. I need God to help me, too", that they would see this example of imperfect people needing the Lord's help. And as they get older, they would know how to apologize themselves, and ask God for his transforming power in their own lives.
Children are such an example of God's forgiveness.
Offered so quickly.
So graciously.
So freely.
Later that day, after they were all in their beds and the house was quiet, I went to my bedroom to fall (exhausted) into bed, and I saw this on my nightstand:
Only one of my children can write that well so far. (But I LOVED that it was a mystery note.)
Emotionally spent from a long day filled with my own failures - I sobbed.
And I begged God to make me slower in my responses, "not quick to anger, but abounding in love" more tomorrow... and the next day... and the next. It's amazing how recieving grace does that. Gives you hope for tomorrow. And the heart to try again.
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